Vain

I am of two minds as to why I started this blog. Part of me started it because I do enjoy writing and it has always been something very theraputic for me throughout my entire life. The other part though...secretly hopes people read this blog and find me somewhat fascinating in my infinit bore(boring-ness? Borality?). I also have a journal on livejournal.com and I read a girl's blog there who I find very interesting. She has many followers. She's one of those beautiful people who seems to have everything, including all the fucked up mental beliefs about themselves that seems to come when a person has looks and intelligence. Perhaps my being incredibly fat is a blessing in disguise(big ol' fatty disguise! hehe). Because I am certainly exceedingly intelligent and if I had both looks and intelligence I might go insane.

I am joking, btw. I do have confidence in my smarts so much so that I can recognize I am not exceedingly smart. I'm probably about average, perhaps ever slightly above. A boy messaged me on okcupid and it turns out he's a math genius. He speaks to me in riddles, or what I percieve as riddles because I have no fucking idea what the balls he's talking about usually. I told him the first night we spoke that he was too smart for me. He assured me that he was not and that I was very intelligent. I just felt stupider. Funny how that works.

Ugh, its 5:18am. I'm looking at different dog breeds because my best friend is up and she showed me the Boston Terrior as the next dog she wants. Its funny because my Grandpa was just advising me to get that breed when I get a dog. Yet another goal I want to achieve in the next year. I want to get an apartment with a friend, or roommate that I'm comfortable with and get a dog.

Okay, I'm sleepy.